So. This is my 100th post. I have been racking my brain for something witty, poignant, wise and something that will finally get those folks at the We Publish Bestsellers And Will Make You Rich And Famous Forever Publishing House to notice me and make me rich and famous forever. Or maybe to get Oprah to notice my pathetic yet brave existence and give me lots of cool free stuff for being a pathetic yet brave inspiration. Sniff.
Instead I had a week where Dr. Wonderful told me I probably had to have shoulder surgery again to fix the first shoulder surgery (although he did look wonderful telling me :)).
I had to have a test that involved sticking a six inch long needle into my shoulder joint.
Dr. H. told me he thinks I have a form of MS that is really really bad and will cause me to be blind and paralyzed. Oh, and dead. I have to have a blood test for this possible diagnosis and have been dragging my feet, being of the Ignorance Is Bliss school of thought.
I had my monthly Tysabri infusion on Wednesday, one stick for blood work, two sticks to start an IV (missed on the first; oops sorry about that).
Had an MRI of the brain to track MS progression yesterday. Another stick for IV contrast. Have an MRI of the spine tomorrow. Another stick for IV contrast. Then…I think that’s it for bodily assaults for at least the next two weeks.
My parent’s continue to be in crisis and I continue to be the family pariah amongst my siblings who rejected out of hand my plan for a geriatric social worker to assist us.
Consequences of being out of work for almost a year continue to dog me.
I am still fat.
However, (in my life there is always a ‘however’, otherwise I wouldn’t still be here) I had a perfect cup of tea this morning while I watched the rain.
I have friends who endlessly affirm me and their love for me.
I have children who, despite our issues, I adore. And who, I suspect, have some affection for me.
I have this incredible medium of the Internet, where I have made so many new friends and have been exposed to such fascinating lives.
I sit cross legged in bed with the newspaper, cozy on this gloomy day under a favorite soft, worn patchwork quilt. My knitting is piled beside me, along with skeins of gorgeous hand spun wool I found on Etsy. My bedroom is exactly how I want it, old oak dressers, floral linens, buttery yellow walls, books everywhere. My little dog snuggles against me and heaves an enormously contented sigh.
Life is good.