Friday, February 22, 2008

Fell Off

Fell off the wagon last night in two’s:

2 pieces of pizza
2 martinis
2 pieces of soda bread

One big tummy ache. A colossal headache.

Tons of self-condemnation.

I don’t even LIKE soda bread for Pete’s sake!

But the martinis were lovely. :) And so was the pizza.

I swam off about 400 calories yesterday, so that mitigates the damage somewhat. But my pride and confidence are sorely wounded.

I want to be prepared for the next time with alternatives to giving in to cravings. I have to put my thinking cap on.

It doesn’t help that I am very MS-y today. A muscle spasm has frozen my upper back, making it hard to move. I have currents of pain rhythmically shooting down my limbs and my right hand is numb and twitching. A very fun package. Can guilt cause a relaspse?!?! I usually hate taking pain meds, but today not taking them is not an option if I am going to be functional at all.

But on the plus side, it is snowing here in Jersey and it is so, so pretty! Bella and Corrie are enjoying the snow.


janet said...

Marie, don't let the guilt get to you. Every day is a new day. A new start. So yesterday you had a couple of pieces of pizza....big deal. Today you will do better. You have US be your side cheering you on, don't forget that.....

I am trying hard to move more each day, some days are better than others. This snow is making it hard, what am i supposed to do, walk circles around the kitchen table? I have an appointment with my newly found Physiatrists on March 5th, i have such big hopes that he will get me into a therapy pool, I hope i don't have too much "hope" placed on this visit...

I hope the pain eases some today for you

Marie said...

Thanks, Janet! I will hang onto your words.

It sounds funny, but a variation on walking around the kitchen table (lol) could be walking in place. I have this home walking DVD and every once in a while I use that. It's great because you can do it at you own pace. It's by Leslie Sansone.

I hope the physiatrist is helpful. I know Suseo has a great one that has really made a difference for her.

The therapy pool would be great. Stretching in the pool and being able just to float around has been a godsend for me. On days when the treadmill is just too much, at least I know I will feel good in the pool.

Jessica said...

I love Leslie Sansone walking DVD, especially when I'm lazy :) Don't hang up on the mistake. The important thing is keep going, and feeling a little bit fitter everyday. Just forget about the scale for a while. Let me know if the multi vitamins is working out for you too :)

Anonymous said...

Guilt doesn't do anything except make your urges to eat more, happen more often - at least that is my accepted operating system.

No swimming but I am trying to do more around the house - climbing stairs several times a day - making simple furniture (well - putting together a kit.


Marie said...

For me guilt is one of my other senses - sight, hearing, taste, guilt... lol If I wasn't feeling guilty about something, I wouldn't know myself. But I get your point.

Stairs are good - 10 calories a flight! And putting together furniture has to be good for heaps of calories, if only expended in frustration!!