Friday, June 29, 2012

Goodbye Nora. Thanks for Everything.

I loved Nora Ephron’s work.  She had such a gift for finding universal humor in mundane encounters.  Her sense of romanticism was so seductive, if unrealistic.  We bought it because we wanted to.  She ripped our hearts out when she discovered her husband’s infidelity.  She raised our hopes that someday we would meet our own Harry and have what she was having.

I was so sad when her death at the age of 71 was announced this week.  But the accolades from her friends were so touching, so warm that it was almost a pleasure to read her obituary.  Now I know it was pretty unlikely that someone was going to say to The Times “She was a total cow and I couldn’t stand her.”  But still, if I receive even a fraction of that kind of praise when I go, I will be a happy corpse.

In her book “I Remember Nothing”, she wrote lists of things she would miss and things she wouldn’t.  I think one of life’s important lessons when we lose someone is being reminded how little time we really do have and how precious this world is.  So I have written my own two lists.

Thanks, Nora.

What I Won’t Miss

Multiple sclerosis

Doctor’s visits of any kind

Always being unhappy about my looks


Rampant social injustice


Those horrible big buzzing beetles that somehow get past your screens on summer nights

Actually, all bugs.  Screw the ecosystem.


People with no sense of humor

Knowing there is an audience for programs such as “Housewives of ….[fill in the blank]

Customer service reps who clearly hate people and don’t give a rat’s ass about your problem

Mean spirited, ugly comments after newspaper articles online

Chris Christie

Glen Beck

Job interviews

Heat waves


What I Will Miss

My children and grandchildren

My sweet little dog

Writing and the sheer joy of words

My spectacular, funny, giving, loving friends

My cousin Steve, the embodiment of kindness to me my entire life


The sound of the ocean


Fabric and the potential in every yard


Macaroni and cheese



Lemons piled in a blue bowl

Bruce Springsteen

Conan O’Brian

Dick Cavett

Lily of the Valley



The New York City skyline

Getting a package unexpectedly

A fresh pedicure with bright red polish

A soft, pastel linen shirt on a hot summer evening

Cuddling under a quilt I made myself, made in colors that simply make me happy

The antique pearls my mother gave me


What would your lists be?


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Patty Woodland said...

Isn't it nice to realize that your list of wills exceeds your list of won'ts?

Muffie said...

I'm with you -- she put into words what we often just think! Those lists were the best.

Shorespinner said...

I won't miss breast cancer and all the follow up.

I will miss the color orange.

Great lists, Marie!

Marie said...

Patti - wow, that is a cool observation and one that didn't occur to me. And the best part is, I could have gone on and on. :)

Muff - thanks; it is always good to see you. :)

Shorespinner - It makes me sick that breast cancer had to be on your list. I am so sorry.

Orange is SUCH a wonderful color. :)

Thank you all for taking the time to stop by AND for leaving a comment! xoxo

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