Friday, November 21, 2008

In The Depths

I unexpectedly slid into a wicked black hole a few weeks ago. Awfully dark and terribly deep. And silly me, there I wallowed, remembering hardly any of the tools I had on me to get back up.

Thank you to those of you who have reached in to help haul me out. I am more grateful than you can ever know.

In maritime/hydrographic use, depth means the vertical distance from the plane of the hydrographic datum to the bed of the sea, lake or river.

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

What the heck am I depressed about?!?! At least I never, ever have to understand what that means.

I am working on some posts, so I will be back to what passes for normal for me soon. Fingers crossed. :)


manju said...

I'm so sorry to hear this, Marie! Please remember that you do have friends you can talk to if you feel like it. Sending good vibes to you from across the ocean-

Marie said...

Manju, you are one of the friends that are dragging me out. :)

I can feel your calm and gentle vibes, even across all that air and land and water.

Anonymous said...

I'm sorry Marie. I've thought of you often in the past couple of weeks and wondered. That was the reason for the note at BC. I will add my good vibes to Manju's.

(I know only too well about the black hole. It is indeed a wicked place.)

Marie said...

Ugh, I'm sorry Tricia, that you know too. It is...different for everyone but the same too in what it steals.

It sucks.

Ah well, at least I'm back here. Now on to the rest of the things I love and have neglected.

Barbie said...

Marie, good to see you're clawing your way back up to the light =) I find winter to be the hardest, with the limited daylight and the chill.

We miss you on the Korner, babe.

~ Barbie

Da Old Man said...

happy to see you back


Anonymous said...

Been in that black hole myself. It is a very dark and lonely place, but I try to surround myself with people and things that keep drawing me out.

Feel better soon,

Lisa Emrich said...

Marie, I've been there too, many times. But instead of a hole, mine is a black riptide, void of air or living creatures.

What amazes me is that I've been to that place before and you would think that I could see the waters rising.

Each time you get a glimpse of light, store it in your mind's eye. Each time you feel a flame of warmth, save it in your torso. Each time a friend sends you a virtual hug, give yourself a literal hug.

These little things will make you more bouyant, living you to the top of the well. Here's a hug.

Marie said...

I am torn between being embarrassed and being honored!

Thank you Joe, Barbie, Lisa and Anne. Thank you all who have left me a comment or just thought of me and wished well for me.

These are the tools I referred to. But boy it is so easy to forget you have these gifts when you are stuck!

Anonymous said...

Marie - I wish I'd known!! Good grief, you sure have listened to me on some pretty dark days, and I would have loved to be able to help you out in the same way.

I agree - it is hard to see the gifts when you are stick in the darkness. But just reach out my friend - you are surrounded by people who care and want to help.

Please accept a hug from me too!!!!

Anonymous said...

Ok, that would be STUCK in the darkness.

Damn fingers are dyslexic. Where is the edit function in this place. :)

Marie said...

lol I knew what you meant my sweet Patti!!!!

Now if I had thought about it, I could have called you. But then I wouldn't be depressed and isolated anymore, would I?!?! No fun in that! lol Then I wouldn't be in that chasm. And I just noticed that at first glance the picture I used to illustrate the post asshole. lol How apropos!!

I am so glad to hear from you. Hope all is well. xoxo

Jane Turley said...

Look here Woman,

Mrs T has been having a bad time lately too which is why I've not been over before BUT you have to put on a smiley face and FORCE yourself to keep doing things in order to drag yourself out of this hole. Now first of all come over to my place and read my new BBC article which I hope you will make you laugh and then I challenge you to write one of your daft posts that make me laugh! Here's a few suggested topics;

1)Men; Why can't they multi task?

2)10 ways to get the best out of your toilet brush.

3)A review of the last book or film you've just/read seen.

Right that's something for you to be working on...

Oh btw...take care and a big cyber hug.

Marie said...

Oh Jane!! Have I told you how much I love you?!?!

Ok, I will read your new article even though I AM PEA GREEN WITH, um...I mean so happy for you that you are writing for the BEFFINGBEFFINGC. Sigh. And you are so freaking funny too. It is a wonder I can even speak to you. Double sigh.

I feel shamed also because you have so many reasons to curl up and feel awful and in my case it seems gratuitous.

Those are super ideas!! Thanks. This actually was a nefarious scheme to pick your brain for posting topics. Nyeh heh heh. My villainous ruse has been successful!!!

Thank you my darling Mrs. T.

Jane Turley said...

Good, good, good Marie! Yes, I look forward to seeing your musings and hope that they will tickle my fancy.

(I also hope Pierce will tickle my fancy but that's a much longer story and very, very descriptive.)

Marie said...

Oh Jane, when Pierce tickles your fancy that is going to make quite the story. I can't wait. lol

Bubele said...

Hi Marie,

I have just read about your journey and have to thank you for sharing. I am a young mother who was very close to losing my life when delivering my youngest son (now 18 months). After being in a coma and begging to be released to go home, I had such a powerful sense of being simply in love with being alive and ebing with my 2 boys. Everything seemed so simple and clear and theough the busy past year, I have lost a little bit of this, even though I vowed not to. Thank you for reminding me of the important of keeping things simple and funny!