Gosh. How on earth did that happen?!?!
At any rate, Happy Happy Birthday to me and to Bruce (Springsteen, of
course) whose b-day precedes mine by a few years but follows mine by a few days. How is that for a riddle? Extremely lame? Yes, I agree, but what can I tell you, I AM lame. ha ha ha ha
I know, I know I am hopelessly
corny. Happy birthday Bruce and thanks
for being a remarkable entertainer and human being. I know some people consider him controversial,
but there cannot be any argument about the abundant good works he does, many of
which go unknown.
A retrospective on The Boss:
As for me, it has been quite a sextet of decades, that is
for sure. I have had amazing experiences,
ups and downs. While the hard stuff has been extraordinarily
challenging, the good has been so spectacular that it far outweighs the bad. Most
of the good has revolved around my children.
I was blessed to be mother to four cherished human beings. In ways they will never know, they have
provided me with moments of such pure, sparkling joy that I am literally left
without words. Those times, some simply
seconds of an exquisite baby smile or a spontaneous, merry hug, shine up
through the years. I hug these memories
to myself. They are my treasure.
Even though every day brings struggles, I have so much to be
grateful for. It is hard, especially
when I’m dealing with a lot of pain. But
during the hard times, I pray and then I list for myself the things I am so
lucky to have. My darling grandchildren and
my wonderful, generous friends. I still
have a roof over my head, although I am not sure for how much longer. Then there are the little things. A perfect cup of tea. A good book.
The tactile satisfaction of embroidery, like painting with thread. The soft murmur of rain. My
little dog who wants nothing more than to be adored and my even littler cat who
is a constant source of irritation but she
is unfailingly attentive and as a result it is hard to dislike her.
I miss my mother particularly on my birthday. We had
a fractious relationship for much of my life, but we were so different we were
bound to clash. I was not what my mom
had wanted or expected in a daughter, I had wildly divergent values and goals
from hers. I simply bewildered her at
times. As I got much older I made an
effort to understand her and not deliberately provoke her by challenging her ideals
and taste, as I had for such a long time.
My sister and I had many a good cackle in private, but I was truly sorry
I had disappointed her and then rubbed her nose in it. I talk to her all the time now, telling her
how much I regret our lost time. I
believe she is watching over us from her place in Heaven, where she is healed
and happy. Believing she is happy and at
peace at last gives me great satisfaction.
But more than anything I wish she was still here.
One thing I have been especially grateful for has been the
opportunity to express myself through this blog. Writing has been one of the most rewarding
things in my life. The sheer pleasure of
stringing words together in a way that appeals to people has been a
delight. Sadly, someone I love deeply
and whose opinion matters to me, recently told me that they considered my blog
something hateful and destructive to our family. I have never deliberately done
anything to offend anyone I love, so I was stunned to hear this. The idea that something I was having such fun with unknowingly caused hard feelings just sucked the spirit right out of me The accusation has tainted what had previously been such source
of pleasure and I have had a hard time finding my way back to writing. But I am trying and also trying to be
attentive to anything someone might find objectionable.
Moving on….
What could be nicer than a window seat and a book on a rainy
day?
I have amended A. A. Milne’s sweet poem. My bit, with abject apologies to Mr. Milne,
is added in bold.
Now We Are Six
When I was One,
I had just begun.
When I was Two,
I was nearly new.
When I was Three
I was hardly me.
When I was Four,
I was not much more.
When I was Five,
I was just alive.
But now I am Six,
I'm as clever as clever,
So I think I'll be six now for ever and ever.
Then came some more
Although never a bore.
Decades happily full
Eventful, without any
lull.
Ten then twenty then
thirty
School, wed, babies,
much glee.
Forty cheerfully came
With much of the same.
Fifty arrived with
unwelcome news
An illness, alas,
would give me the blues.
Now we are sixty, struggling
and stressing.
But the Lord, dear friends
and loved ones surround me with blessing.
I am so happy to be here still. Happy Birthday, me!
Did you like what you read? Let others know. Thanks!
